Chapter 3.18 W.W.F.N.L.D.




Operation Fake Niceness was going exactly according to plan. But it wasn’t easy. Playing nice with these intolerable townies was exhausting. I had to keep reminding myself that it would all be worth it once I trick Mira into finding a cure for my curse.  As much as I wanted to tell everyone what I really thought about them, I had to remind myself to play nice. Whenever I was struggling with that, I would ask myself W.W.F.N.L.D. What Would Fake Nice Linc Do?

And, believe it or not, I was really good at it. Better than I had thought that I would be. Fake Nice Linc had everyone fooled. Mira has been going out of her way to be extra over-the-top cheery to me.

Mira likes to come over, and sit and talk…and talk… and talk. She does most of the talking. About what, I couldn’t tell you. I never pay too much attention to her. I usually tune her out, and instead I focus on what my life will be like once I am back to my awesome self.

It is only a matter of time before I am restored to my full mind-blowingly awe-inspiring self.  Then I will be far away from this god forsaken hell pit. And far away from witches, and evil magic, and blood sucking vampires. The only thing I will have to worry about is where to put all of my awards when my albums go quadruple platinum.

And that time can’t come soon enough!



Renatta had once made the feeble attempt at a joke when she commented that Moonlight Falls has two seasons: fall and winter. Well, right now we are in the middle of one of the coldest winters in Moonlight Falls’ history. Our trips to Cauldrons & Cappuccinos Cafe have become more of a frequent tradition. But it is getting harder and harder to keep up this fake nice charade.  Especially while being surrounded by all of this over-the-top obnoxious Snowflake Day decor.

For the season, the cafe has been transformed into an extremely excessive Winter Wonderland.  It is so horrendous that even my mom (who is obsessed with Snowflake Day) would be sick.  From the new stupid wall paper, the stupid table clothes, to the stupid trees in every corner.  It makes an annoying situation even more aggravating and unbearable!  I would rather have to sit through more of Bert’s stupid stories than sit in this stupid cafe.  But I have to keep reminding myself W.W.F.N.L.D.?

So, Renatta, Mira, Flint, and I always sit in the same corner table, order the same silly concoctions, and talk about the same silly bullshit. Again, with me mostly tuning them out.

One thing I can’t tune out is that piano in the corner.

It calls for me every time I am in the cafe. And that damn siren’s song is getting hard and harder to ignore. My fingers ache to play the piano once again. It has been too long since I played any musical instrument (not including air guitar jam sessions with Bert).

“Do you think you might want to play this time?” Renatta asks me every time she sees me fixated on the piano for too long.

And every time my answer is the same, “no.”

“Oh come on,” Flint pressured. “You stare at it constantly. At this point you can either play the damn thing, or buy it a drink.”

“Yes, please play the piano,” Mira usually keeps out of this part of the conversation, but today she made her opinion heard. “You have been so down in the dumps lately. Playing the piano might make you feel better.”

I locked onto Mira’s rainbow colored eyes as they bore holes into my soul. I really didn’t want to draw attention to myself. But once again I thought W.W.F.N.L.D.?



With a defeated sigh I got up out of my corner chair and walked over to the old wooden upright. As I made my way through the crowded cafe I could hear Mira whisper to the others, “no matter how good or bad he sounds, at the end of the song we need to stand up and cheer for him.”

It annoyed me that Mira was going to applaud no matter what I sounded like. Well, I don’t need her charity, and never in my life have I ever needed a pity clap. I sat at the old wooden bench already knowing exactly what song I was going to play. I remembered a classical piece, Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata, that both Miss Melanie and Grandpa Ryan said was their favorite.

I started to play the song and as soon as I hit the first note of the piano keys that I knew would bring the house down!



As I played I closed my eyes and thought back to when I was a young kid. It seems like it was so long ago when I was just a little child sharing the bench with Miss Melanie. My heart fluttered when she would pat me on the back and say how astonished she was at my gift. Or how I beamed with pride when Grandpa Ryan and Grandma Cindy cheered after I played this song for them. It made me feel a warm sense of joy to know how proud they were of me. Not the same empty praise that I got from the kids at school. This was genuine.

It was love.


When the song was done I opened my eyes to a booming round of applause. Not just Mira and her dopey gang, but the entire cafe was clapping for me. They were acting as if Beethoven himself had just come back from the dead to play for them.

The old me would have loved all of this attention. I would have taken a bow, then performed an encore, just so I could hear the applause all over again. But this time I put my head down, and walked back to my seat as quickly as I could. My itch for playing was scratched, but another part of me was not liking all of this attention.

“Linc, that was incredible.” Mira gushed “Why didn’t you tell us you could play like that?”

“Who knew you had it in ya” was Flint’s response as he patted my shoulder.

And for the first time since I met her, Renatta was silent.

“It’s nothing, really,” I tried to get them to drop it and talk about something else, “I learned that song when I was 7. No big deal.



I wanted everyone at the table to stop talking about me, but when Mira said, “I have always wanted to learn how to play the piano,” I knew that we were not going to drop it anytime soon.

“It was easy for me,” I replied. The old me was slowly starting to come out and I was not hating this attention, even if it was just Mira and her dopey friends. “My mom made me take lessons when I was a kid.”

“We have a piano at home,” Mira continued. “But I don’t know how to play it.”

“I wanted to just play the drums, but Mom insisted that I learn piano as well.”

“If only there was someone who could teach me to play the piano.”

“I liked playing the drums and when I got older I enjoyed the guitar the most, but learning the piano wasn’t hard for me either.”

“Dude, do I have to spell things out for you?” Flint waved his hands in my face, “Mira is asking you to give her piano lessons!”



I didn’t know if I wanted to be a piano teacher for Mira, but once again I thought: W.W.F.N.L.D.? Plus, it will give me an excuse to be at her house more often, and I will be able to talk to her one-on-one. I don’t have to deal with Renatta’s insufferable questioning, or Flint’s sarcastic comments. I can casually mention that I am looking for a way to reverse a certain spell. Then bam: it will be hello to my awesome self, and goodbye to this stupid town and all of the stupid townies in it.

So the very next day I went over to her house to start the lesson.

“I don’t have any sheet music,” I confessed as Mira lead me to the living room. “I was always able to memorize the music, so I never needed any.”

“That’s alright,” Mira responded with her signature cheery smile, which is still as annoying as ever, “I managed to find a few sheets of music when I was clearing off the piano.”

I looked at the music trying to find one that wouldn’t be too difficult to start out with. ​Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star is a pretty basic piece of music that even Willow could have played on her toy keyboard. As we sat down I noticed that Mira was a bit too close for comfort. Half of me was hanging off the bench, but Fake Nice Linc just smiled as I pointed to the different keys and what notes they made.



There is a saying that people who can’t dance have two left feet. Well if that is the case, then Mira has two left hands!

Plumbob, she was bad. Mira pressed too hard on the keys, and instead of beautiful notes she produced a loud racket. She was out of rhythm and only 1 out of every 6 keys were in the correct note. I tried to be patient, I tried to show her the correct keys to lightly play. But before long my patience had run out.

“What is wrong with you?” I growled. “Did you not pay any attention to my instruction? How hard it is to play a simple G?”

“Wait, which one is G again?” Mira smiled her dopey smile thinking that she was being funny. Well, I am not laughing.

“You are so bad at this, I can’t even properly put it into words. This song is not that hard. My sister could have played this song on her toddler play piano” I growled. “What made you possibly think that you could play the piano? What is wrong with you? My horse’s farts sound better than you, and are more on key!”



“Listen here, you self centered, condescending jerk face!  You want to know what is wrong with me.  Well I want to know who the hell do you think you are!?!?” Mira was no longer cheery. She was down right pissed off. “Not everyone is as naturally talented as you are. That does not give you the right to be so critical.”

I didn’t know what to say. I have never seen this side of Mira before. Even while dealing with Alcander.

“Do you think that your precious Beethoven composed any of his symphonies on his first try? No. No, he didn’t!”

Mira wasn’t done with me yet.  She concluded her verbal assault by saying, “I have been nothing but nice, and friendly, and kind to you.  And THIS is how you repay me!  Further more, I have put up with a lot from you.  I have gone over to your house, and introduced you to my friends, in hopes that you might feel less of an outsider in your new town. But you couldn’t care less! You can’t be bothered to engage with us! Don’t think I don’t see you zone me out when I talk.  Friendship is supposed to be a two way street, but I get NOTHING from you!  I know for a fact that you don’t listen to even half of what I say.  But for the sake of our  so-called friendship I smile and try to be nice.  Well, no more!!  Until you can learn some patience I think that you should leave!”



I guess that there is nothing left for me to do now but go. I tucked my tail between my legs (literally) and sulked out of Mira’s home. I regretted my actions the instant that I got outside.

That is not what Fake Nice Linc would have done.



SIDE NOTE: This might be my last chapter for a while.  I had all of my notes, the entire generation outline, and tons of chapters written on my tablet.  Then I spilled soda all over said tablet, and now all of that hard work is gone.

I still have my desktop computer that has the game saved on it.  And I have every intention of continueing this legacy (Lincoln’s story is far from over).  It will just be at a slower process than before, because I have to rewrite everything from scratch.  Hopefully you can stick with me, but if not then I completely understand.  If anything this will give me an excuse to work on a few other side projects and help me catch up on all of your stories I am so far behind in.


13 thoughts on “Chapter 3.18 W.W.F.N.L.D.

  1. Well, looks like he wasn’t such a good actor as he believed. Mira was able to see right through the facade of fake niceness! Uh… It’s now going to be really hard to get her trust and sympathy back.
    I’m so sorry you’ve lost your notes.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lincoln has some big delusions of grandeur, and Mira sort of brought him back down to reality.
      Which, let’s face it, it needed to be done.
      At first I was so very deviated about my tablet (that thing was the key to my sanity). 😫😫 But I am trying to stay positive in that this is a way for me to focus on a few of the other side projects I have swirling in my brain. So, the glass is always half full.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. She saw right through him! I’m glad she told him off. Maybe he’ll think about what she said. He needs her. So maybe. I can hope right? Sorry you lost everything… that’s gotta be horrible! I’m so sorry.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No one seems to be fooled by Lincoln. Other people have told him what they thought about his arrogant attitude. But it totally sounds different coming from Mira.
      We’ll see what, or if there is anything, Lincoln can do to gain back her trust.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh no, I’m so sorry about your notes..! Of course we’ll be waiting whenever you’ll be ready to give something to us, don’t worry about that! 🙂
    Oh man, I wasn’t expecting Mira to go full rage mode on him, but this was great! And he totally deserved it. He thought he had everyone fooled, but not her. She could totally see through his bull$%&# and *he* was the one fooled into thinking she was just a stupid, naive girl.
    I guess now he’ll try to bring out all the charm in order to fix this and I am so looking forward to it!
    Oh, and that dialogue where Mira was trying to tell Linc she needed piano lessons while he was gushing about how awesome he is at piano while completely ignoring her had me rolling! 😀
    This was great! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mira has been nothing but nice, but she could only take so much sh** for so long. In reality the only one that was fooled was Lincoln.
      I’m not sure what Lincoln is going to do next. He really only has the one move. And it is going to take more than just the “Charming Charm” to get back into Mira’s good graces.
      I still don’t know if I am going to redo my notes, or just the few chapters that I never transferred to my PC. Right now it is hard to find motivation to do any of it. In the meantime I have a few ideas for some side projects that might be a fun change of pace.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m so glad Mira decided to call Lincoln out on his bull – AT LAST. I had a feeling she wasn’t stupid, just nice. That was a well-deserved put-down. Hopefully it gets through his thick skull that he’s a douche. I have a feeling it takes a lot to piss off someone like Mira, so he’s really been an idiot.
    Sorry to hear you lost all your notes! 😦 That really, really sucks. Hopefully you can remember most of the awesome stuff you had been thinking up.
    This was a great chapter, dear. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. My father in-law had a saying, “you can only pile the shit so high before you fall back into it.” Others have called out Lincoln and his selfishness. But it feels different coming from Mira.
      I have rewritten chapters before, and they always cone out better than before. Right now I am having a hard time finding the motivation to do it. But on the bright side, that doesn’t tend to last very long.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Mira is a patient person, but she can only take so much.
      Others in Moonlight Falls have told Linc all about what a jerk he is, and he has never seemed to care. However, it sounds different coming from Mira. So maybe, Linc will take her words to heart. We shall see


  5. Girl, how’d I miss this? :O I’m so sorry about your notes. I wouldn’t do so hot without mine, that’s for sure. I know how hard that can be.

    I’m glad Mira wasn’t fooled by Linc’s performance. I don’t want her to get hurt, and Linc needs to learn his lesson once and for all.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Please don’t feel bad about missing anything. Especially since I am so far behind in reading your chapters. 😞😖
      Lincoln doesn’t have anyone fooled like he thinks he does. Mira has just been too nice to say anything until now.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh no I am so sorry about your tablet! It can be so gutting to lose all that work, I feel for you. But I will still eagerly await the next chapters to find out how Linc manages to ruin his life even more haha.
    Damn, you know, you write this dick so well I genuinely wonder how he is going to ever improve. I wonder if he’ll actually find out/realise he needs to be a nice person and love someone before he changes back, because then will his actions be self-serving and therefore not genuine enough to reverse the spell? It’s like the good place all over again lmao!
    Mira SNAPPED. I’m so proud of her!


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