Side Note: It is with mixed emotions that I am here to tell you that this is the last chapter of Stella’s story. There will be this chapter, an epilogue, then that concludes Generation 2. I know that isn’t goodbye forever, but still I am having a hard time letting go of Stella. I have gone back to make sure that all of the chapters for Generation 2 have a title picture. I have also added a ton of Bonus Pictures here.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy the last chapter of Stella’s generation. And as always have a great day, or night depending on when you are reading this.
This is a very important day for you. Isn’t it Stella?
Yes, it is my babies’ birthday!
How does that make you feel?
I feel excited. Nervous, a bit anxious, but mostly excited. The time has gone by so fast. It feels like just yesterday I was telling Brandon that I was pregnant, and now our little bundles are about be toddlers.
You said that you feel nervous and anxious. Can we go back to that? What makes you feel anxious about all of this?
Well, we are about to have two toddlers crawling about. At this stage they are so impressionable. Their brains are like little sponges, soaking up everything around them. I am excited to see how each one of them will grow, and at the same I am nervous that I might screw something up.
I guess my biggest anxiety is that the house isn’t completed yet. The painters are behind schedule, and we can’t move in yet until the plumbing is fixed. So we are all still living in that cramped little space.
Yes, you did say that you are building a new house on your recently purchased lot. But is that all that is making you feel anxious?
Yup, pretty much. I mean it is still kind of weird having my parents around so much. But they both have been so helpful and supportive. I wouldn’t be here with you if it wasn’t for them.
Last week we talked briefly about your relationship with your parents. Do you mind if we discuss it some more? How do you feel your relationship with your parents has been progressing?
Well, as I said before, Cindy and Ryan have been strangers to me most of my life. My aunts never mentioned them, never talked about them, and avoided my questions to the point where I stopped asking about them. I have come to understand why they gave me up, and honestly I have never hated them for it.
But now that I am a mother I can truly see how hard it really was for them. Having them around, helping with the twins, has helped us have a stronger bond. They are going to occupy a small home on a corner of our lot. They have their privacy, while still being close to the family. It has opened up a dialogue between us, and I can talk to them like I never had before.
You have talked about your inability to open up to others, how do you fell that you have progressed with that?
Well, these sessions have helped with that.
Yes, I am glad that you are able to see that. I remember when I first started seeing you. You were very closed off. You sat right there on that sofa with your arms crossed, not wanted to engage at all. And now look at you.
I too am amazed at the progress that I have made. This has even helped me become a better wife. I love Brandon more than anything. He is so good to me, and has been loving and supportive throughout everything.
I was horrible when I was dealing with my postpartum depression. I said things that I regret tremendously. Despite how bad I was; Brandon stuck by my side. When I was pushing him away he knew that was when I needed him the most. I could never repay the love and kindness he showers me with.
Brandon has seen the darkest side of me, but loves me anyway. Brandon and I have been through so much together. And I know that if we can get through this then we can get through anything.
And you will get through this, Stella. You have already come so far. You should be proud if yourself.
Well, that about wraps it up for this week. I will be at my son’s graduation next Wednesday, so you can talk to Nadine on your way out to schedule another time that works for you. Don’t forget about the relaxation techniques we discussed. They will help when you feel the most stressed.
Lastly, enjoy the day. Trust me when I say that your children grow up so fast. They are only this age once, so savor every moment.